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Finding the right person with whom you can share your life has never been an easy process. While connecting to individuals has become a bit more convenient thanks to online dating platforms and social media, dating is still a fairly complex process. One common myth is that there is a perfect person out there for everyone and that finding the person will lead to a fairytale ending of living happily ever after. In contrast, relationships require work and compromise from both partners and ultimately, the most important thing one can do when dating is to be authentic and open to the possibility of building a meaningful connection with someone who shares the same values and interests.

Don’t…dismiss someone after just one date! Instead of jumping to a conclusion, consider that the other person may have been extremely nervous or just having a bad day. Unless it is obvious things won’t work out, have a second date to really get a feel for that other person. Many successful marriages all started on a bad first date! Who knows, you could be one of them too, one day. Do…be adventurous! When it comes to planning a date, think outside the box and book an activity you haven’t done before. Need inspiration? Subscribe to the @made_my_date mailing list and let your inbox be filled with fun dating ideas.

Many of us have extensive prerequisite checklists before even considering going on a first date. Maybe you want someone who is exactly like you, whether it’s interests, religion, or background. Maybe you’re not looking twice at people who have a certain dating history, are over a certain age, or own a cat (because you’re way more of a dog person). While shared values are crucial and compatibility is often determined by similarities, try getting to know someone before making assumptions based on your prerequisites. The only “prerequisites” you need are your non-negotiable values, like kindness, integrity, and humor. Otherwise, base opinions on how you feel, not off of a checklist. Pay attention to the person in front of you and try not to project a narrative or assign meaning to traits before you even know the person. Ask questions and genuinely care about why someone is the way they are before determining whether or not they are for you.

You go out with a girl, you both seem to have great chemistry. After your date, you both go home happy and satisfied. Now you think things could only get better. But after a few days, she begins to pull away. And because you have no idea what you’ve done wrong, you become confused and frustrated, making even bigger mistakes that only push her further away. Or, maybe you’re a decent-looking guy who just never has any luck getting beautiful girls to pay attention to you. Whatever the problem may be for you, this article will help you understand some key things you might have been overlooking. When it comes to dating, there are some untold rules that many guys are unknowingly falling short on. And when you make these same mistakes for too long without any luck, dating can become just another frustrating game for you. That said, let’s look at ten mistakes that some guys may not even know they are making. If you’ve been having a rough time dating, take note of these. You might be faltering.

Some guys don’t know what makes women tick either because they don’t have a good relationship with women or because they don’t spend some time observing them. The thing is, women and men think differently on many grounds. And if you’re too self-absorbed as a guy, thinking the same things that will impress you will impress a girl, you’re going to get disappointed a lot with women. Most of the things that turn a woman on are surprising and counterintuitive to most men. And in this article, we’re going to be discussing 10 of them. As much as it is good for a man to be dominant and masculine, showing vulnerability once in a while can make your woman feel that special bond with you.

Consider a low-key coffee, tea, a walk, or a drink instead of dinner: Instead of meeting for dinner on the first date, choose an activity that is potentially shorter, and more relaxed like a walk or a coffee. That way, if you realize after 45 minutes that you just aren’t compatible, you’re not committed to a longer (and potentially expensive!) dinner that may be unpleasant and awkward for both parties. If the date goes well, you can continue to cocktail or segue to dinner and continue the conversation. While it’s easy to add a snack or a bite, it’s more difficult to extricate yourself from dinner.

Next up: Playing hard to get or waiting for the other person to make the first move. Besides outdated gender roles, these “rules” come from the idea that whoever cares less in the relationship is the one who has the most power. But should love be about power? It’s OK to care; we’re supposed to care about each other. So what does it matter if you “come on too strong” or “care more?” Be true to your feelings and what you want. Oh, and making the first move can save us a lot of time wondering if they like us back.

There’s something about the end of one year and the beginning of a new one that naturally inspires you to take stock of your old habits and start some smarter ones. This well-researched phenomenon is called the “fresh start effect” — landmarks, like a new year, motivate people to set goals. If your goal involves figuring out how to find love in 2022, I’ve got news for you: you don’t have to spend hours tirelessly swiping on those dating apps to attain that happily ever after. In fact, many of the best dating tips I have to offer have nothing to do with looking for other singles, but rather, working on yourself. The more time and effort you put into examining and changing the patterns that are keeping you “stuck,” the more likely you are to recognize real love with lasting potential when you find it. In short, it’s time to turn inward. What shortcomings may be preventing you from attracting the partner you desire? What unhealthy beliefs or tendencies are driving you toward toxic people? How can you build yourself up so that you have the confidence to go after what you want, and the resilience to handle rejection when it doesn’t work out?

My motto is: you get what you put up with. So, are you willing to accept someone who walks all over you, disrespects your boundaries, or takes from you without giving in return? Expect more. Better yet, work on believing that you deserve more, and that way, you can hold any future partners accountable. Start by making a list of all the skills and positive qualities you can bring to the table in a relationship. Are you a compassionate listener? Generous with your time? Have a great sense of humor? If you need to, ask friends for their take on what your biggest strengths are. Once you’ve drafted your list, read it every single day. Eventually, it’ll start sinking in that you have a lot to offer in a relationship, and therefore, should only be with someone who not only appreciates all of those qualities but also has a lot to offer in return.